The first time a teenager brings a boyfriend or girlfriend home is a big moment, for the teenager and for the rest of the family. It can feel awkward, exciting and slightly nerve-racking all at once. A relaxed, friendly welcome makes a lot of difference. You do not need to arrange a special event. A few practical touches, and a calm, warm tone, will help everybody feel at ease, including the guest, who is probably more nervous than anyone.
Agree with your teenager in advance what they would like. Ask when the visit is, how long it should be and whether they would like to eat with the family or spend time alone. Let them tell you about their guest, such as favourite foods or anything the guest does not eat. This shows respect, and it saves you from trying to guess. Make sure the rest of the household knows about the visit too.
A relaxed welcome
Keep the atmosphere light. Offer a drink and something to nibble when the guest arrives, ask a few easy questions about their day and then let the young people do their own thing. Resist the temptation to ask too many questions or to tell embarrassing stories. A friendly hello, and a bit of humour, is more than enough. Younger siblings might need a gentle reminder to give the visitor some space.
Think about the practicalities of the house. Where can they sit, what can they use in the kitchen, and where is the bathroom? Agree with your teenager on which rooms are open for the visit and which are not. A living room or kitchen is usually easier for everyone than a bedroom, and it lets you say hello without hovering. Tell the guest what time supper is, and invite them to stay if that suits.
When the visit is over, ask your teenager how it went. Listen more than you talk. Thank them for introducing you, and say that the guest is welcome again. A warm welcome now makes the next visit easier and shows your teenager that they can bring their friends home. Over time, the house becomes a place where young people feel comfortable, and where the whole family is glad to spend time together.
